Query for my middle grade novel, A Drive of Dragons

[mary_j_59]

Hi, everyone! I'm still querying HONOR, but while I'm waiting I decided to get going with A Drive of Dragons, as well. Here's my first crack at the query letter. Thoughts and criticism are welcome!

Being a prince or a princess isn’t all honey and roses and tournaments and beautiful horses. It isn’t all courtesy and lessons and marriages, either. Frank and Verity know this. When fire-breathing dragons invade their kingdoms, the teens know it’s up to them to solve the problem and save their people. But, when they ride out to negotiate with the mythical beasts, they discover that the dragons have a problem, too. It may be up to Frank and Verity to save the dragons in order to save Halland and Patria.

A Drive of Dragons is middle-grade fiction, complete at 35,000 words. I’m a writer and librarian who has loved stories about dragons since I was eight. This story should appeal to readers who like classic dragon tales such as The Reluctant Dragon and Farmer Giles of Ham; it’s something of a tribute to those books. But I hope readers of Cressida Cowell’s wonderful series will enjoy A Drive of Dragons, too. I look forward to hearing from you. (etc.)

Comments

[anne-arthur.livejournal.com]

Seems excellent to me, but I don't really know much about the matter.

[mary-j-59.livejournal.com]

Thanks for the encouragement, Anne! Over on querytracker, the feeling seems to be that I need more details and that the query lacks voice. I agree with the first criticism, but not with the second. BTW, did I respond to your latest story yet? Will be going over to your blog to check.

[anne-arthur.livejournal.com]

I'm not really sure what 'voice' would be, Mary! But yes, perhaps more detail (especially about those lovely dragons?). And the story is very much Verity's alone (to begin with at least) but the query does make it sound as if she and Frank know one another and are acting together - perhaps it should reflect their meeting and growing relationship (with one another and with the dragons)?

[jongibbs.livejournal.com]

Good luck :)

[mary-j-59.livejournal.com]

Thanks, Jon!