concrit, anyone? ( a work in progress)

This is the first part of an original fic I've had in mind for some time. David, if you're still checking in, I'd be glad to hear how you like it. Of course, everyone else is very welcome to comment, too!

About 600 words, g-rated, no warning, but, since it's SF, probably not to everyone's taste. This is the prologue to a novel (hopefully). The working title is "Honor" and the main characters are a 15 year old girl and 16 year old boy. More after the cut:

( Read more... )